It began with filling out a NCAA March Madness bracket. One of my coworkers wanted to fill out a bracket based solely on the mascot--could Team X's mascot beat up Team Y's mascot? I thought it was a fun idea, so we started on it.
Our problem came with this match up--Notre Dame (2 seed) vs. Akron (15 seed).
As you may know, Notre Dame's mascot is the "Fightin' Irish". What a mascot!
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| Notre Dame's Mascot: The Fightin' Irish |
Akron's mascot is the kangaroo. The Zips. The Zips? I didn't know that, but that doesn't mean anything--I hadn't heard of Akron till tonight!
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| Akron's Mascot: Kangaroo/Zips |
Here is the debate that ensued--
Me: I kinda think that a Fightin' Irishman could really take on an animal like a kangaroo.
Lee: But have you seen those boxing joeys before? You should pull up a YouTube video of a boxing joey. They're vicious. I think it could beat up a Fightin' Irishman.
(Pause to watch this YouTube video about a boxing joey. Enjoy! It's hilarious!)
Me: But it's a FIGHTIN' IRISHMAN! (me waving around my fists and sticking out my bottom lip like the picture of the mascot)
Lee: Well, what's the location? Because if it's in the wild, then I think it would be the kangaroo. If it was in a factory with a bunch of potatoes, Irishman.
Me: I think we need to look at a neutral ground, like a basketball court or an open field or something.
Lee: Hmm....have you seen the claws on a kangaroo?
Me: Yeah, those are scary looking. I don't think I would want to go against a kangaroo--it's going to be taller than me and it could definitely jump on me and kick me and gouge out my eyes.
Lee: Honey, if I was in a life or death situation, I think I could take down a kangaroo.
Me: You think you could? How would you do that?
Lee: The kangaroo strikes by first leaning back on his tale, then coming forward to hit. When the kangaroo is coming forward, that's when I would strike. I would jump on its back, get it in a head lock, then I would punch its brains until it died. Of course, that's only in a life or death situation.
Me (looking at her husband in horror): Oh.
Lee: Well, how drunk is the Irishman? Because if he's so drunk he can't walk straight, then I think the kangaroo is going to win.
Me: Good point. Oh...but, those Irishmen can hold their liquor well and I suspect they would be good fighters in whatever state of inebriation.
Lee: Well, that's quite the stereotype, you racist Chinese person!
That's how it went in our home today. It took twice as long to finish that bracket.
We're curious to know who you think would win in this match-up--the joey or the drunk? Post your vote and your reasoning for your choice.
We'll let you know in a few days who we ended up advancing to the next round.
Thanks for the laugh! I'm glad that Bob and I aren't the only ones that have crazy conversations. So, I'm voting for the Irishman if: A) He uses Lee's lethal tactics, B) He's got a bunch of his buddies cheering him one (Spec"taters"),and C) definitely quite drunk.
ReplyDeleteKristi, I'm glad YOU have crazy conversations too! I sometimes think we're a little out there.
ReplyDeleteThose are interesting reasons for your choice. I will share them with Lee--he'll get a kick out of them!
Sorry Winter, I agree with Lee.
ReplyDelete1) A kangaroo has wild instincts and when cornered, I'm sure it'd fight with amazing strikes, thus knocking the Irishmen out.
2) A fighting Irishman (drunk or not) is just a pissed off guy ready for any fight. No tactics. No strategies. Just get 'em while the "guy" is down. Good luck getting that bouncing joey down. Sure his buddy would like to help, but that wasn't the perimeter set. One Irishmen vs. one joey = one joey victorious.
I'd vote for the Irishman. And I'm kind of scared of Lee and really hope he never has a life or death situation with a kangaroo.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the mascot technique is a good one...I'll remember it for next year. I went alphabetical order this year whenever I was stuck. So, I hope the beginning of the alphabet is lucky for me this year!
I vote for the kangaroo since it's capable of using 4 limbs effectively. Plus the ND mascot looks tiny, probably cus of disproportional head size. That's my assessment anyway. I'm glad you guys have weird arguments too.
ReplyDeleteOkay. Have you all taken into account that the Notre Dame mascot is a leprechaun?? He's got magic powers at his disposal. Also, according to Wikipedia, leprechauns who wear green coats are a type of "trooping fairy", so where there is one green-coated leprechaun there is a horde of them. So the real question is, can the kangaroo take on a horde of leprechauns?
ReplyDelete